Showing posts with label Dutch Wife. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dutch Wife. Show all posts

1/31/12

Japan's New WTF "Face Slimmer" Plus Alpha

Japan's New WTF Face Slimmer

At first look, this appears to be a Dutch Wife mouthpiece or some kind of S&M bondage gear. But, believe it or not, this new Japanese "Face Slimmer" invention is for real.

A fairly well-known Japanese cosmetic company named Glim started marketing this product at the end of last year. As for WTF is it, the following explanation may not make much sense, but here we go.

First of all, according to the directions, one is to get into a bathtub(?) and then put the Face Slimmer in their mouth:

Japanese Woman in a bathtub with the Face Slimmer

Then one is to repeat out loud the Japanese vowel sounds - "a i u e o"
『あ い う え お』 for three (3) minutes a day everyday for the rest of one's life.

a i u e o あ い う え お

Apparently by doing that kind of exercise, both women and men (one size fits all) can strengthen their lips and facial muscles, prevent wrinkles and reshape their visage into the popular "Duck Face"(?) Mmmmkaaaaay, well for more confusion on all of this please read the Google Engrish Generated page.

Japan's New WTF Face Slimmer

Get yours now at Rakuten!

Japan's New WTF Face Slimmer

But wait. There's more!

From the makers of the well-known but useless Hana Hana contraption also known as the Japanese NOSE ELECTROCUTION! comes the all-new "Facial Lift Atonce":

Facial Lift Atonce

Using this one is easy and it does not require a bathtub. Simply put the Facial Lift Atonce in your mouth, turn it on, it vibrates a complete 360 degrees and then by some kind of magical power, one then gets a facelift.(?) The directions say that this exercise should also be done three (3) minutes a day everyday for the rest of one's life. This product is also known as "A Face Lift in a Bottle" which apparently produces a very similar effect on men as that of beer goggles. O.O

A Face Lift in a Bottle

Related:

Japanese Cats Ears For "Communication"

Bathtub Girl iPhone Case From Japan Of Course