Korea's Web Damsel Chip-Chan Goes Outside?

Chip Chan as previously seen on her live video webcams.

Via The Kernel September 15, 2013

Recently in second-best Korea it was reported that a young woman was literally "trapped" on the internet inside of her own live video webcams! This damsel-in-distress news quickly made its way to 4chan and then exploded across the Asian internets. Many viewers struggled to interpret her scribbled signs and one time when she remained motionless for hours, several others began to wonder if the web had been trolled by a corpse!

Well, even though it is well known that there are no girls on the internet, it turned out that she is a real, living young Korean woman residing somewhere in Seoul. She has been given the nickname of "Chip-Chan" partly based on her own self-scribed Engrish history as seen on her personal blog entitled "Verichip for criminal destroys me". And in the below video, it does appear that she actually goes outside:

Mmmmkay.... so we have a woman in trouble. She suddenly gets discovered by millions of guys on the web who are now all fully registered members of her fan club base known as "Chippies". Then soon afterwards she seems to either find the way out of her "trap" or she went to sleep in one of her filing cabinets as she has been known to do in the past. Whadayathink? WTF Actual right? Because Korea right? Pr0n site promo right? Incidentally, the local authorities are aware of this woman and they know her real, true identity and address in case anyone is worried.

But probably the most likely outcome is that Chip-Chan is now actually dating some of her very own "Chippies" and no longer is "afraid of sleeping" so to say. Well either way, her live video webcams are still up and running even though she has temporarily disappeared from the spotlight.

See also:

Korean Kids Sing The Ramones

Buy A North Korean Bride Only $50,000!!!

From North Korea: 'Pyongyang Style' by Steve Gong

Just Another Fook Hing Chinese Restaurant

Located at 40 Nostrand Ave in Brooklyn, New York here is a photo of a sign for the well-known Fook Hing Chinese restaurant! And it's not just another restaurant, it is an internet icon.

Related:

WTF Fu King Chinese Restaurant

Japanese Fuckin' Department Store Sale

WTF Japanese Yahoo Auction of The Earth!

Via Rocket News 24 November 1, 2012

It has long been known that in fact the earth was originally made in Japan. Also, we all know that in the past, Japan has built some really crazy things. For example back in 1993, Japan installed a new ocean right next to the old ocean in Japan! That worked well for a while. Then just last year, Japan installed a new world in Japan! So now it only makes sense that a Japanese seller is running an online Yahoo auction of The Earth itself!

Product Image:



And below is a Google translation Google Engrish generation of the product description:

The earth is yours God will come out to dream again, this before. Since I Sell said. The exhibit is the body of the earth. We exhibited this in tears because of the lack of money. Do you want to own the earth things too? I have also set unprecedented speedy. Please consult the shipping method. Thank you that do not know there was something in the question. Tender who prank, our excellent collection agents will always ask. Please let us know as soon as possible in case of cancellation. Because I do not want the trouble as possible. Because those who do not cancel the tender considered proof of purchase intention is confirmed from the question column - from God - that there is no proof of purchase intention please purchase intention from the question column m bidders (__) m with God evaluation in consultation than 10, those over 5% might cancel bid or bad evaluation. Well even if it is what I say ... the last time was very sorry for the inconvenience to everyone with a great deal of new asshole shit you do not read the air. (Minutes added 16:22, October 30, 2012) There is no speedy now ... Oh (additional 57 minutes at 10 October 31, 2012) purchased within one hour after the successful bid including early termination because there are many tender Rashiki bid prank too If you can not I will cancel the message of making a bid by the highest bidder convenience. Please bid on your note (additional 38 minutes at 11 October 31, 2012) does not answer to the same contents. Sense to ask the questions on the Q & A was perusing all. (Additional 59 minutes at 17 October 31, 2012) is no longer interesting because you have reached the limit amount bid. Secretariat like yahoo, Suka What should I do? (Added 23 hours 25 minutes 31 October 2012) when you go to bed 50 minutes ... 23 I'm sorry. (Additional 33 minutes at 8:00 on November 1, 2012) I think what everyone Secretariat Yahoo auction bid of this energy, does not help anything? Thank you consider (additional 08 minutes at 0 November 03, 2012) I'm sorry. Please ask your questions on the person doing the similar products and questions because of the bad condition I had a flu vaccination me. I think tomorrow will be slow because it is after a long break. Thank you consider. (19:01 minutes added November 04, 2012) Please tender only so please buy really came also reduced bid mischief soon. I've been too tired to work tender cancellation. Thank you.

This auction of The Earth will continue for two more days. As of this writing, the current bid is at 20,500 yen ($255.42). However, that amount could change at any minute as the seller stipulates that each bid must include a message from the buyer that expresses a serious intent to actually purchase the Earth. If it doesn't happen, then the seller will start the auction all over again at 69 yen ($0.86). For more information, please refer directly to the official Japanese Yahoo Auction page.

See also:

Buy A North Korean Bride Only $50,000!!!

Buy Your Chinese Bride on Ebay Now!

Hong Kong Speed Dating "Dinner With Foreigners"

Because China: Engrish Textbook Comic

XXX Large Size

See also:

Because China: The Big Blue Ploice Truck

Because China "HFC Hitler Fried Citizens"

Because China: New McMansion Penthouses!

Because China: The Big Blue Ploice Truck

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

1st Annual Chinese Bikini Cow Girl Contest

Bikini "cow model" to help out the first Sino-US "cow beauty contest"



XXX Large Size



XXX Large Size

Via China News Network/Google Engrish August 20, 2012

"August 18, Shanxi Shuozhou Sanin County, bikini model for quality dairy cattle to do "cow model" intimate contact with cows. Shanyin County Joint United States Orange date rule Warwick County held the first "cow beauty contest", by the quality of the milk production, appearance, family descent elected the first cows Miss "champion. China news agency issued Wei Liang photo"

Here is a Chinese TV news clip of this event:



See also:

Miss Bikini of Chimelong 2011

Learn Chinese From Sexy Lesbians

Chinese Engrish T-Shirt: Spend Calm Life

Because China: Getting Off With Your Lover

Sexy Chinese Models Teach Sexy Mandarin

Is China A Racist Country?

Below is a photo of an advertisement placed by the Cambridge Kids English Centre in Guangzhou, China for a part-time ESL teacher. In the title it clearly states:

"Native kids English teacher (Black or White) 18,000 rmb"

Also at the bottom of this ad it states:

"you can apply if you are black with good teaching experience and a valid visa"

but then:

"BLACK teachers get 14,000rmb" (>_<)



The folks at the the Cambridge Kids English Centre have taken this ad down, but the cached page of it can still be seen here in Yahoo.

Related:

Is Japan a Racist Country?

Teach English in Fukushima Japan

Chinese Engrish T-Shirt: Spend Calm Life

XXX Large Size

The above photo features a beautiful model wearing a funny Chinese Engrish T-Shirt entitled "Spend Calm Life" and we have provided the below "translation":

SPEND CALM LIFE
FEEL AT PEACE NATURALLY
CARRY ALL EVERTHING
The special indicating
BEFORE ONE
THERE IS NOTHING
TO BE AFRAID OF
Blood Me.

THERE IS NOT AT
ALL THE MIND
TO GIVE UP
THERE IS NOT SCATY THING
FOR HER AT ALL NOW
YOU PLEASE STRONGLY LIVE LIKE HER, TOO
GRATIFYING RESULT...

Obviously, this is another attempt by China to overthrow the world's Engrish superpower Japan.

Related:

Japanese Engrish Teacher Teaches Engrish

Thailand Engrish Visa Instructions

Thailand Engrish Visa Instructions

See also:

Buddha Statue Photo by Jon Sheer

Elevator Sign in North Korea/Best Korea

Elevator Sign in North Korea/Best Korea

Here is a funny photo of an elevator sign in North Korea/Best Korea:



And don't miss the popular North Korean TV show The Elevator Girl:



See also:

North Korea Wins World Champion Title!

Best burger—BEST KOREA!

Japan's New WTF "Face Slimmer" Plus Alpha

At first look, this appears to be a Dutch Wife mouthpiece or some kind of S&M bondage gear. But, believe it or not, this new Japanese "Face Slimmer" invention is for real.

A fairly well-known Japanese cosmetic company named Glim started marketing this product at the end of last year. As for WTF is it, the following explanation may not make much sense, but here we go.

First of all, according to the directions, one is to get into a bathtub(?) and then put the Face Slimmer in their mouth:



Then one is to repeat out loud the Japanese vowel sounds - "a i u e o"
『あ　い　う　え　お』 for three (3) minutes a day everyday for the rest of one's life.



Apparently by doing that kind of exercise, both women and men (one size fits all) can strengthen their lips and facial muscles, prevent wrinkles and reshape their visage into the popular "Duck Face"(?) Mmmmkaaaaay, well for more confusion on all of this please read the Google Engrish Generated page.



Get yours now at Rakuten!



But wait. There's more!

From the makers of the well-known but useless Hana Hana contraption also known as the Japanese NOSE ELECTROCUTION! comes the all-new "Facial Lift Atonce":



Using this one is easy and it does not require a bathtub. Simply put the Facial Lift Atonce in your mouth, turn it on, it vibrates a complete 360 degrees and then by some kind of magical power, one then gets a facelift.(?) The directions say that this exercise should also be done three (3) minutes a day everyday for the rest of one's life. This product is also known as "A Face Lift in a Bottle" which apparently produces a very similar effect on men as that of beer goggles. O.O



Related:

Japanese Cats Ears For "Communication"

Bathtub Girl iPhone Case From Japan Of Course

WTF Japan Accepts Worldwide Refugees!

Mmmmmm......not really. But for at least one foreigner obsessed with smoking and going to Japan, all of his dreams come true in this very funny and ironic WTF TV short:



Actually, this is a somewhat dated ad for Midor Anzen ミドリ安全株式会社 and its useless "smoking section machines" that are seen in just about every office all over the nation. Below is a wacky google translation Engrish generation of one of this company's Q&A's:




See also: Japan: The Place of Dreams

Japanese Engrish Teacher Teaches Engrish

Here is a funny Japanese TV parody segment of a Japanese Engrish teacher teaching Engrish to gaijin in Japan:



See also: Tommy Lee Jones Acts Like a Boss for Suntory

Teach English in Fukushima Japan

"We are Fukushima Prefectures up and coming school. Since opening in December 2007, we have opened three schools in Koriyama-City and Fukushima-City and teach at several International Companies in Fukushima Prefecture."

For more information check out their website at freecomenglishschool.net

From India: Smart English Speaking

Engrish Interviews with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz

Here are some very amusing Engrish interviews of Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz by three Japanese comedians during the recent Tokyo premiere of Knight and Day:



Via Daily Motion